Those were the last words that I spoke to my Dad the night that he died.
His words to me?
"I hope so."
I look back on that night now, as an adult, and realize that he knew.
He knew he would not be there the next day.
There are so many things that I wish I would have said. So many things that I wish I would have done.
So many regrets.
Why didn't I go give him a hug and kiss before I went to bed that night? Because I thought he would still be there.
I remember that night like it happened yesterday.
Being woke up by the sound of heavy footsteps on the stairs.
Being scared.
Not knowing what was going on.
Hearing the words "I'm sorry Ma'am, he's gone. There's nothing we can do."
Hiding under the covers as a fireman came and closed my bedroom door.
My world crashing down around me.
My brother carrying me downstairs and telling me that our father just died.
Uncontrollable tears.
Watching as my dad's body was brought downstairs on a stretcher and then taken out to an ambulance.
It being so very cold.
Sitting in a dark living room all alone as my Mom, brother and sister all sat in the kitchen talking.
Feeling lost and confused and alone.
Many memories have faded as the years have gone by. But not these.
These memories will be with me for the rest of my life.
