Ponderings of a Middle-Aged Mom: A Thought that Lingers. . .

I do not even know how to approach this.

Because it is something that I am not even remotely close to knowing for sure.

It is only a thought that has been lingering in the back of my mind.

She is only nine years old. But is it possible that she could be gay?

I only wonder this because she doesn't like any of the boys in her class.

I try to remember how I was at nine. Did I crush on boys at that age?

I have a hard time remembering.

I know by sixth grade I was head over heels in "like" with at least two of the boys in my class.

Her best friend's birthday was on Monday. As a present, she drew her friend a picture and wrote her a letter.

The picture was of a girl, so I figured that it was a portrait of her friend. The letter. . . The letter was something else. . .

It explained that the picture was a combination of her and her friend. And went into detail as to what facial feature belonged to who. So that if she was ever lonely all she had to do was look at it and know that she wasn't alone.

It's a nice thought.

But. . .

It was the way the letter was worded that made me wonder. . .

Is my daughter gay?

She was so proud. And I couldn't find the words to try and explain that they might be taken the wrong way by someone else.

Is this something that every parent wonders/worries about?

Am I reading too much into it?

Is it simply just a phase?

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Linking today with Shell from Things I Can't Say

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Crystal @ PoM · 695 weeks ago

My daughter, who is bi-sexual, went through that. She had her first girlfriend at 13. It's possible that she's just curious. Almost every woman I know has at least experimented with a female at some point.

I wouldn't worry over-much yet.

To be completely honest though, I've found that I've liked my daughters female companions a lot more than the males, lol.
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1 reply · active 695 weeks ago

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Stasha 77p · 695 weeks ago

Was there anything that gave you a clue though?

Or was it just out of the blue, "Mom, I'm bisexual."??

I really am not worried. Because she is my daughter and I love her no matter what. . .

I just don't want her to be treated any differently.

Does that make sense?

@OneandOnlyOka · 695 weeks ago

Not sure, but I bet for most people 9 is really to young to be sure of anything.
I was tomboy as a child(still am in many respects). Because of choices I made in high school, everything seemed to add up to others that I was a lesbian. No joke. Truth is, I'm not even close. Yet people truly believed they were right. I swear they through a party (behind my back) when I started dating hubby. Then all my issue became drug related????

My point is: you can't make the assumption. Be supportive of her no matter what. The truth (either way) will come out when it's time, when it's important.

2 replies · active 695 weeks ago

I am a tomboy too. I am not a girly girl at all. . .

That's why I'm not worried.

Like I said above, I just don't want her to be treated differently.

And I also want her to be comfortable enough to be able to talk to me about it too. . . But I think that has to start with me, doesn't it?

Letting her know she can talk to you about anything is one thing. Prying for something that may or may not be there is different. Quick way to make her defensive.

Shell · 695 weeks ago

Maybe it's just a phase, maybe you are reading too much into it...and maybe not. Time will tell and you will be there for her no matter what.

Yes. I will be there for her 110%. No matter what.

I have been really trying to think back to when I was 9 and in 4th grade. . . I don't really remember 'liking' boys then.

But everyone is different and develops differently. I know this.

This was just me wondering out loud.