If you missed that, go check it out!
I finally have a connection that is semi decent enough to allow me to post the next set of questions.
Ready?
Here we go!
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4) What five words would you use to describe 13 year old you? Use a different 5 words to describe you as you are today. Would 13 year old you be surprised at the words that are yours today?
Thirteen year old me:
shy, quiet, optimist, emotional, dreamer
me today:
Mother, pessimist, worrier, serious, melancholy
Thirteen year old me would be surprised at every word describing me today except mother. I always knew I would be a mom some day.
I was always a 'glass half full' type of person. Then I became an adult and realized that sometimes there is only one way to look at a situation. I used the word pessimist but I don't think it's that. It's more 'always looking at the seriousness of the situation'. I wish I could be the eternal optimist like I was as a child. I just can't. I have been through too much shit since I turned 18. I pretty much became a champion at worrying from that same age. Getting married and throwing myself into the real world like I did skewed how I looked at things.
5) When’s the last time you watched a loved one sleep? Describe the circumstances and tell me what you were thinking.
One of the last times Randall was in the hospital I watched him as he slept in his hospital room.
I listened as the IV machine purred, watched the medicine drip into his line. I sat there and watched him sleep, wanting to touch him but knowing that as soon as I did, he would wake up. He doesn't sleep well when he is here. So every little cat nap counts.
As I watched him the thoughts that ran through my mind were something like this:
"I love you more than you will ever know. I am scared. Scared of a lot of things but scared the most that I will lose you. I am trying to be strong for you but it is so, so hard. I never expected to be in this position. You are the one who is supposed to support me. And that sounds so selfish. It is selfish. Neither one of us asked for any of this. And now here I am, the one who is everyone else's rock. I want you to be better. I want you to reassure me that everything is going to be OK. I know it will be OK eventually. You just need time to heal and you need time to rest."
And in the time it took me to think those thoughts, a nurse walked in and woke him from his nap. To check his IV or to give him meds or to check his blood sugar. I'm not sure which now.
6) What has been your daughter’s favorite age thus far and why?
This one is easy. Her favorite age, in my opinion, was the age of five. Simply because that was when she started school.
We did not send her to preschool. And while I know she could have benefited from some of the things there, like interaction with other kids her age, I did not see the point of it. I spent my days teaching her to write her letters and numbers. By the time she was three she could write out her full name with no problems.
She would always ask when she would be able to go to school. And was always told 'when you turn five'. I would have to count it down for her by seasons.
"You are three now and it's summer. That means you have fall, winter, spring (and her fourth birthday), summer, fall, winter, spring (and her fifth birthday), summer and then you start school!"
Her big brown eyes would light up and she would smile from ear to ear.
She loves school and has loved it from the beginning. She hates to miss a day. Actually tears up if she is sick and can not go to school.
She gets her love of school from me. I just hope she doesn't travel down the same path that I did.
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More teasing from me as I am going to end this round here!
Hopefully I will be able to get the other questions posted some time next week.
If you have not stopped by Pretty All True, you need to get on that.
Kris is awesome. She writes from her heart and will always leave you either giggling from the insanity or in tears from the reflective posts.
You must check her out!
Do it!
Or I will be forced to do something awful to you! (Like what, I don't know. But I would come up with something!)
And in the time it took me to think those thoughts, a nurse walked in and woke him from his nap. To check his IV or to give him meds or to check his blood sugar. I'm not sure which now.
6) What has been your daughter’s favorite age thus far and why?
This one is easy. Her favorite age, in my opinion, was the age of five. Simply because that was when she started school.
We did not send her to preschool. And while I know she could have benefited from some of the things there, like interaction with other kids her age, I did not see the point of it. I spent my days teaching her to write her letters and numbers. By the time she was three she could write out her full name with no problems.
She would always ask when she would be able to go to school. And was always told 'when you turn five'. I would have to count it down for her by seasons.
"You are three now and it's summer. That means you have fall, winter, spring (and her fourth birthday), summer, fall, winter, spring (and her fifth birthday), summer and then you start school!"
Her big brown eyes would light up and she would smile from ear to ear.
She loves school and has loved it from the beginning. She hates to miss a day. Actually tears up if she is sick and can not go to school.
She gets her love of school from me. I just hope she doesn't travel down the same path that I did.
______________________________________________________________________________________
More teasing from me as I am going to end this round here!
Hopefully I will be able to get the other questions posted some time next week.
If you have not stopped by Pretty All True, you need to get on that.
Kris is awesome. She writes from her heart and will always leave you either giggling from the insanity or in tears from the reflective posts.
You must check her out!
Do it!
Or I will be forced to do something awful to you! (Like what, I don't know. But I would come up with something!)
Have a wicked awesome Thursday peoples! :)
Logging you in...
Haven · 733 weeks ago
And your answer to question number 5 (there is a 5 things going on here right now) made me tear up.
Stasha 77p · 733 weeks ago
Kids ARE the best at age 5.
But that is also the age when they stop being just yours.
When they start school, they become the entire worlds.
Your child is now the teacher's child.
Your child is now the bus driver's child.
Your child is now the principal's child.
You entrust the well being of your baby to these people.
I cried when Kaylee started Kindergarten. She was so grown up about it. She rode the bus (for the first time) all by herself. We assured her that we would meet her at school. We watched as she hopped off the bus at school and followed her as she went to go get in line to get breakfast.
So grown up about the whole thing and there I was crying like a big baby.
Robin K · 733 weeks ago
And this is so powerful:
"I love you more than you will ever know. I am scared. Scared of a lot of things but scared the most that I will lose you. I am trying to be strong for you but it is so, so hard. I never expected to be in this position. You are the one who is supposed to support me. And that sounds so selfish. It is selfish. Neither one of us asked for any of this. And now here I am, the one who is everyone else's rock. I want you to be better. I want you to reassure me that everything is going to be OK. I know it will be OK eventually. You just need time to heal and you need time to rest."
Thanks for sharing; this really touched me today.
Stasha 77p · 733 weeks ago
The person who I married when I was 18? Was someone who I thought I was in love with. He was more a man-child than a man. I married him expecting us to share all the responsibilities (because that's what I had been taught a marriage was about). What I ended up with was being solely responsible for all bills. Rent, electric, cable and any other expenses were all left to me.
It was not what I had signed up for. And there were several arguments. I put up with that bullshit for 4 years. Four years longer than I should have.
But the things of my past have made me the person I am today. I have tried to take my mistakes and learn from them. Turn them into life lessons.
Still working on some of them.
kriswehrmeister 57p · 733 weeks ago
And then life intervened, as it so often does.
But here I am! Late. But here.
I love the answers you have provided for these questions. Love them.
I love that you are gaining more and more confidence in your skills as a writer. You are thoughtful and lovely and insightful.
Love this, Stasha.
So much love.
Stasha 77p · 733 weeks ago
Better late than never lady!
I love these questions that you sent me! They have made me think. About a lot of things.
It's funny to me how before I would sit down to blog. About whatever. Venting bullshit, really.
Lately? I sit down and ask myself, "What story do you want to tell today?" and it has made a world of difference in how I am writing. At least I think so anyway. It's taking a while but I am slowly finding my voice. And I humbly thank you for that.