One thing that keeps circling is how people see me. How people on the outside see me.
Most people? See a strong willed woman. A woman who takes no shit. From anyone.
A woman who is a loving mother and a dedicated wife.
A woman who is strong. Who has kept her family together through a lot of tough times.
A woman who has been the rock for her husband and her daughter since her husband became ill.
A woman who speaks her mind.
A woman who fights for what she believes in.
I believe that I am this woman. I know she exists.
My problem lies in who I see when I look in the mirror.
I do not see the person everyone else sees.
The woman I see? She is not a woman at all. She is still a girl.
She is scared. She is weak.
She is so quiet and shy that most would say she is backwards.
She takes shit from everyone and just lets it build. She never speaks up for herself.
She feels inadequate as a mother and even more so as a wife.
She keeps to herself.
She is afraid of confrontation.
She sees glimpses of the woman she wants to be.
I am working on seeing the woman most people see.
I am working on being and becoming me.