Really.
But I have been lucky enough to receive two beautiful awards.
OK. . . One is a little on the sarcastic side. But that's alright. I will take it anyway!
Hee hee!
The first award was given to me by Roxanne at Unintentionally Brilliant.
Beautiful, isn't it?
This little beauty was created by Jill at Yeah. Good Times. Isn't she just full of sarcasm? Love it.
Gotta love the little kitten that appears to be dancing in confetti or jelly beans or maybe even gumballs! I am not entirely sure.
As with all awards, there are rules that come along with accepting it. Here they are:
1. You must proudly display the absolutely disgusting graphic that I have created for these purposes (put it in your post, you don't have to put it in your sidebar, I think that would seriously be asking too much). It's so bad that not only did I use COMIC SANS, but there's even a little fucking jumping, celebrating kitten down there at the bottom. It's horrifying! But its presence in your award celebration is crucial to the memetastic process we're creating here. If you need a higher resolution version... I totally have one!!
2. You must list 5 things about yourself, and 4 of them must be bold-faced lies. Just make some shit up, we'll never know; one of them has to be true, though. Of course, nobody will ever know the difference, so we're just on the honor system here. I trust you. Except for the 4 that you lied about, you lying bastards! But don't go crazy trying to think of stuff, we're not really interested in quality here.
3. You must pass this award on to 5 bloggers that you either like or don't like or don't really have much of an opinion about. I don't care who you pick, and nobody needs to know why. I mean, you can give a reason if you want, but I don't really care.
4. If you fail to follow any of the above rules, I will fucking hunt your ass down and harass you incessantly until you either block me on Twitter or ban my IP address from visiting your blog. I don't know if you can actually do that last thing, but I will become so annoying to you that you will actually go out and hire an IT professional to train you on how to ban IP addresses just so that I'll leave you alone. I'm serious. I'm going to do these things.
2. You must list 5 things about yourself, and 4 of them must be bold-faced lies. Just make some shit up, we'll never know; one of them has to be true, though. Of course, nobody will ever know the difference, so we're just on the honor system here. I trust you. Except for the 4 that you lied about, you lying bastards! But don't go crazy trying to think of stuff, we're not really interested in quality here.
3. You must pass this award on to 5 bloggers that you either like or don't like or don't really have much of an opinion about. I don't care who you pick, and nobody needs to know why. I mean, you can give a reason if you want, but I don't really care.
4. If you fail to follow any of the above rules, I will fucking hunt your ass down and harass you incessantly until you either block me on Twitter or ban my IP address from visiting your blog. I don't know if you can actually do that last thing, but I will become so annoying to you that you will actually go out and hire an IT professional to train you on how to ban IP addresses just so that I'll leave you alone. I'm serious. I'm going to do these things.
Here are five things about me. And I will never tell which one is the truth. Heh.
1. I have really been married six times before. All my husbands before Randall? Have mysteriously died.
2. I was once in the witness protection program.
3. When I was 18 I almost joined the Army. I really wanted to travel the world.
4. I am fluent in 10 different languages. Including French, German, Spanish, Russian and Chinese.
5. I have spent time in every state except Alaska and Hawaii.
And the five lucky souls that I am passing this on to?
Crystal @ Phases of Me
Oka @ The One and Only Oka
Jayne @ Just Plain Jayne.
Lisa @ KSSNNIKKEL
Amy Lynn @ PBJ Dreamer
People? You are welcome.
But wait. I said I received TWO lovely awards, didn't I?
Yes. I did.
The second award was given to me by Crystal at Phases of Me.
Isn't this just the best award ever?
Just like the award before this one, there are rules to accepting it. They are:
Thank the person who gave you the award and link back to them in your post.
Share 7 Things About Yourself
Pass this award on to 15 recently discovered blogs
Seven things about me:
1. Even though I am trying very hard to quit, I still bite my nails.
2. I never went to college and that is something that I regret every single day.
3. When I am walking up or down stairs? I silently count them in my head.
4. I am the youngest of three children. My brother is sixteen years older than me. My sister is fourteen and a half years older than me. I am fairly sure that I was an "uh-oh" pregnancy.
5. I worked at McDonald's almost 10 years. No, I was never privileged enough to meet Ronald.
6. When I was pre-teen? I wanted to be a comedian. Sadly, I am not that funny. I am only funny 'in the moment'. I can not write funny to save my soul.
7. I used to want to be a radio DJ. I called in to radio stations all the time and made several DJ friends. They all told me not to waste my time. I started broadcasting school and quit because I decided the actual school was a waste of time. This school had one course that taught you the ins and outs of EVERYTHING. In radio AND TV. You couldn't opt out. And I thought that was stupid. If I was there to learn the radio business, what good would learning how to work a camera do me?
And now to pass it on:
WHEW!
Seriously? That's a LOT of linking I did there.
I am full of awesome.
As are the awards.
Enjoy people. Enjoy.
